laziness..

it is easy to be lazy.. nothing to do, just let the life pass by.. it is easy to be scared.. and most of the time this happen to me.. to be scared and instead of fight with it.. to run away.. then.. might happen, that the life could be described as "unactiveness"..

that's what we cannot allow, that's what we cannot let happen.. not because the human could easy find himself as being lost and that's even tougher to fight with, but also that you might wake up after few years and while looking back you would realize, that you waste many precious moments, few months, or few years of your marvelous life..

time to time, not even the closest ones can help you, well maybe they can, but you think that they cannot.. just, believe in yourself.. believe in the dream you have, believe in all the thirst for life you have when you are happy, eager to live..

dont be satisfied with the reached goal.. you will always need to have more, to gather more knowledge, to gather more love, to gather more life.. why? because then we can give more, because then our life is spicy, because then we live!

one wise philosopher said.. the human being is easy to become lazy. why? because it is natural.. the problem is, that when the human is lazy, he or she thinks, that the world is not moving anymore.. and that's it.. to be able to live, we need to move! to do! to think! to love! to give and to take!

he personally said me to live, to love and to think.. the life needs to have a movement, like a beating heart!

so.. let's move!

my dream..

i need to write it down.. split it up and let the dream being spew out.. my studies.. doing a bit research in humanity studies, meeting people, study the history and behavior, psychology, reasons, grounds and the thinking of old masters. i want to study, i want to earn money coz i want to live in a country of my dreams. i want to live with my lady to find out if we can live together or not, i want to live with her, because she brings me joy, happiness, she brings me power and among the others also tears, sadness and understanding.. she brings me all the spectrum of feelings..

what does she want? does she feel the same? why did she pick me? did she pick me? who am i? young man, trying to be someone, to be responsible, to take care, i try to settle down in my soul.. i cannot change the world, frstly i need to change myself..

i hunt for money, because i need them.. if i want to have nice house, i need to buy it, if i would like to move, i need to have money. cannot change the world without them.. not nowadays

i want to live with her, yeah, winter is coming, end of november and i am telling you that i want to live with my lady.. i dunno how it will be after some time, i cannot foretell.. what i know is, that i am in love, time to time i dont understand her, but it doenst mean, that i do not love her, she is my best friend and i assume that i know what she needs..

question is simple.. should i give myself to someone? is it worth? what if my senses, my heart is mistaken? how can i know that she is the one?

answers are in me.. yes, because if i will give myself, i live.. and i also take! worth? no doubts! how can be my heart mistaken? i sense how fragile she is, my lady, i sense what she needs, i sense what she wants.. i sense who she is.. how can i know that she is the one?

for this i have just one answer..

i believe!!

she..

who we are? what is our life? do i want to wake up everyday early in the morning and go to the office? do i want to spend my lovely life in the office? this is a tiny revolution in me.. i dont have work.. i love it and i think also for human being it is necessary to work.. but i think a work.. something for yourself.. something what will bring you joy, something what doens't suck the energy from you..

the days become to be grey, mon till fri.. everyday.. the same.. waking up, towards office, finish.. and then my life starts.. everyday i eat 8 hours of my life by doing something what doens't bring me joy..

this is the revolution in me.. i miss my studies, i have the thirst for knowledge.. i miss my lady coz she is not living here.. i miss the moments of joy, with her, with friends, to travel, scotland, argue and then talk, love and sadness, lovely experiences and mystical nature, i miss her smile..

i am sad..